ANDREW OF AMERICA's
TOP TEN Ramifications of
"If the world were a village
of 1,000 people"
(C) 1997 The Author

10.  It would take 999 people to raise a child.

  9. There would be only one video store and every copy of
     Jaki Chan would be sold out

  8. Only one of them would have seen me in a movie, but 53 of them
     would have asked me out on a date.

  7. The phrase "you're one in a million" would be met with a blank stare

  6. Four out of five dentists who chew gum could not recommend it
     to their patients because there aren't 5 dentists there are five
     soldiers and only 17 villagers have all their teeth.

  5. There would be no Frankenstein for the villagers to chase with
     pitchforks

  4. Three villagers would have watched the Ellen coming out episode but
     289 have heard The Macarena.

  3. Much of the village green would be desert

  2. Fortyseven could afford Beaujolais Village while only six could
     pronounce it 

  1. I'd be the village idiot

A thousand points of light
ANDREW OF AMERICA
Yeah, right.  Only 356 can
afford light.