Here's something kind of scary, y'all.
 
CANCEL OLEG CASSINI
International Demonstration & Non-Violent Actions

On October 29, 1997 NASA plans to lauch 73 pounds of dead Oleg Cassini, the
most overmarketed gay fashion designer of the 80s in the Cassini Space Anal
Probe (C-SAP). Recent Russian and NASA accidents have shown that fashion
sense often fails. The fashion industry and the Pentagon are pushing the
use of fags in space.

Only one pound of Oleg Cassini is hypothetically enough to give every
person on earth a lethal dose of cheap cologne and bad denim. Imagine the
danger of launching 73 pounds of Euroqueen over our planet!  According to
NASA Studies, if there ever was a fashion disaster over Florida, vast
portions of the state would have to be evacuated and all the affected top
models would have to be removed from South Beach - no Evangelista, Tyson or
beautiful people.  Where's Andrew Punani when we need him?

Once nerdy scientists who far too long operated in drab, earth tone
clothing now want something snazzy. Prior to the planned Cassini launch, we
will hold round the clock makeover vigils at the front gates of Gianni
Versace's home. Non-violent attempts to sit on the Cassini's face will
follow the demonstration of shopping techniques by Elsa Klentchfist. Please
help us stop Cassini. Help us keep space free from vinyl unclear daily
organizers and bad toupees.  The future of the jean pool is at stake.  For
more info write to abfabpjg@abfag.orgy.

I'm not making fun of you,
ANDREW OF AMERICA
I'm making fun with you!